Saturday, July 30, 2011
So confused...
Me and my girlfriend broke up last week. We've been on friendly terms...or we were. It was an internet relationship that lasted for over a year and a half, about a year and 3/4. She says she misses me but doesn't want to get back together. I don't want to get back together either and if she did decide she wanted to it would take a lot of convincing to get me to come back. We had fun together, lots of fun. What she says is that it's difficult to talk to me now. At the same time she says she'll always be there for me. But she's rarely online...so how can she be? When we do talk it seems like she doesn't like me, but she swears she does. It seems like she doesn't trust me or care about me or any of my problems (I'm in the midst of a lot of life changing decisions and problems). She's the only person I have to talk to and now I have no one... My past is filled with abandonment so this hits a sore spot hard. She's the first person I truly let into my world and now she's abandoning me, like everyone before her, those I didn't let into my world... I'm scared this is going to be a life-long pattern. She was my first relationship so while I can say it's a pattern with friendships, I can't say whether or not it's a pattern with romantic relationships.
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