Why?!

I was looking forward to these classes. I want to be an artist welder.  These classes would have taught me what I need to know... But now I can't take them. I wanted them more than anything... I want to be an artist welder just as badly. Life just isn't working out for me right now though. What with all the abandonment, my grandmother (who I'm really close to) being near death, my psych problems acting up again, and a lot other stuff that I won't bother you with...